As I told you on New Year’s Day, I love entering a new year. I love the sense of hope and endless possibilities that a new year brings. Considering how many of us out there make resolutions for the coming year, I think most people like that fresh feeling you wake up with during the new year’s first few weeks.
But I also came to think of a few things, bad habits, that many of us have. And when is a better time to let go of them, than when a new year begins? Why not start fresh and get rid of things and habits and thoughts that are holding you back?
So here are 12 things (sort of one for each month, I figured) we should all get rid of during 2016:
1. The fear of failure
Why are we so afraid to fail? Is it because we fear humiliation? Is it because we fear the outcome, bad or good? Or is it because we kind of fear life in general?
Whatever the reason, the most important thing to work on, and the worst habit to get rid of is this one. Because the fear of failure is stopping you from living your life to the fullest. And we’re here to live, aren’t we? So send that fear on its way, there’s simply no room for it, if you want to live.
2. Feeling sorry for yourself
“Oh, my life is so hard.” “Everyone’s better than me.” “I’m no good.” “I have no money to do the things I want.” “Oh, poor me, no one sees me…”
Again (like above) there is no room for this nonsense (as I’d like to call it) that feeling sorry for yourself is. You’ll never get anywhere by doing this. And if you think about it, there’s always someone who is worse off than you (yes, I do know that for sure. Because you’re sitting behind a screen reading this atm). Think of them for a change.
3. The classic “I’ll do it tomorrow”
Procrastination, procrastination… I know this guy all too well. He is my weakness, for sure. But let’s be honest: what good will he ever do to you? What good will ever come out of doing things “tomorrow”? Surprise – nothing! Why? Because we all know it – you’re not going to do it tomorrow, are you? So put your gloves on, or your hat, or just your clothes in general (can’t walk around naked on the streets, after all) and get out there and start doing!
This very moment! (But you’re welcome to finish my post first, though.)
4. Being someone that you’re not
There’s nothing worse for your soul and you whole your being, than trying to be someone else – someone that you’re not. Why? Because it doesn’t make sense. It confuses your core and it confuses the universe, which in turn will start giving you things that you’re pretending to want when you really don’t want them at all but you’d rather want the complete opposite.
I’ll tell you something out of personal experience as well: people love you more when you’re being yourself rather than being someone fake. The world needs you to be you.
5. Living in the past
What are you doing back there? Get back up here!
The past is no fun, because the past has already happened, you know. We don’t have a remote control that can take us back to change things that happened (and thank goodness for that!), so why continue to bring it up? What’s in the past is in the past. If it needs fixing, then that’s what the present is for. The present is also where we live. Nowhere else. So just let it go. Let it goooo!
And forgive yourself and others.
6. Comparing yourself to others
Comparing is bad. Comparing causes jealousy. And jealousy will never ever get you anything or take you anywhere. Look at your own life and not your neighbor’s. Take care of your own garden; make it as pretty as you can and want to. Don’t look over the fense. No need to care what he’s got going on there. Because you don’t know what’s going on inside his house, anyway.
7. Placing blame
Your life is your responsibility. It has nothing to do with anyone else. Yes, people affect you throughout life, and they might do things that you don’t like. But how you deal with situations is what gets you through life in one piece. So stop blaming others for things that happened or didn’t happen; things you have or don’t have. Because it’s all up to you to work with what you’ve got.
8. Beating yourself up
Continuing on from above topic, you also need to stop beating yourself up. Things happen in life that you cannot control – that’s just how life is, and we all go through different things like these. Things that are out of your control are exactly that: out of your control. So stop being so goddamn hard on yourself. Cut yourself some slack and tap your own shoulder. Why? Because you really are doing a damn good job.
9. Seeking love from without
No way you’re going to find unconditional, eternal love from without if it doesn’t exist within. That’s the hard, but simple, truth. Learn to love yourself. That’s the only way for you to fully love others and for others to fully love you. Because when you love yourself and care for yourself you get a certain glow that is irresistable to anyone.
10. “Living” on social media
It’s getting a little bit too much. You know, when people forget to look after their children, because they’re on their phone, and then the child drowns in the pool/lake/ocean – things have gone way to far. Put your phone away for once in a while. Remember what it’s like to actually meet someone or call them up and have an actual conversation? It’s pretty fun isn’t it? Do that, then. Life isn’t on that phone/tablet – it’s right in front of you, if you only look up from the screen. There’s a hell of a lot more beauty next to you than there is on Facebook, anyway.
11. Working more than we live
This is a biggy. Now, a lot of people love what they do and are priviliged to work with their hobby. But most people don’t. And either way, most people work way too much and forget to experience the beauty of life, only because they so desperately want to pay off that mortgage (or whatever it is, and for whatever reason).
But! Don’t. Forget. To. Live.
That’s actually what we’re here for. Not working. We work to live, not the other way around. Right?
12. Closing our eyes
There’s a lot of stuff going on in the world that isn’t too pleasant to look at – there’s the refugee crisis, the climate, twisted gender norms, etc. And I get it – “we’re far away”, “that’s none of my business/problem”, “one person can’t change anything anyway”.
But here’s the deal: one person + one person + one person + one person = people, and people can change things together. We just need to stand up, grow some balls and actually start doing. And you know, it doesn’t have to be something “big”, it can be something small for a person on the street – because that becomes huge to them.
So… Do you want to take this challenge (I guess we can call it that?) with me? Is there anything you’d like to add to the list that is important to you? I’m all ears! Let’s make our lives a more fun, and let’s make this world a better place – for us and everyone one else.